Jenny decided to twist the knife. She said that maybe I'd be a lot happier if I found a girlfriend. Gee, thanks.

"No, really," she said. "Since you're so good at finding people, why not find someone to spend your life with?"

Not like I'm already trying or anything. Geez, not like a people search will solve all your problems. It should, but it can't.

Maybe I need a new job. I was inspired by this article about how to become paparazzi.